Archive | July, 2012

Day Two

22 Jul

This morning I woke up feeling better mentally. I worked a quinceanera at our dude ranch last night, and the menu was fajitas. >_< But, I exercised self-control-perhaps not as much as I would have liked, but it’s definitely an improvement. On the way home, at 1 am, I had my to-go container with me and was really considering eating some more when I got home, but I refrained. I reminded myself that it would be there tomorrow. I also made it a point to ignore all of the bright, colorful, fast food signs and billboards that seemed to taunt me on my way home. Late night eating and fast food binging have been such a part of my life for so long, it’s hard to break the habit. Physically, I still don’t feel so great. I can feel the rumblings in my intestines-they probably aren’t really sure what to make of this green stuff I’m feeding it. They will get used to it, and learn to appreciate it though, I’m sure. I’m also feeling very lazy today, and I know part of that is because I worked late and my body had a difficult time keeping up with being on my feet all evening. As I slowly lowered myself into my bubble bath last night, bones creaking and crackling, I told myself that this should feel like the body of a 27 year old, and not a 67 year old. I will exercise today. Let me say that again, just in case my mind didn’t here me. I WILL exercise today. I’m feeling better already…oh, and as scary as this may sound, I think I’m going to post some pretty graphic before pictures….maybe….if I have the guts. 🙂

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Mission: Stay healthy, stay strong (Day One)

21 Jul

After a night of singing karaoke, drinking alcohol, and a 3 am trip to Waffle House, it’s safe to say that I feel like dog crap. My stomach is in knots from being bloated and constipated, I’m tired, and lazy. I was going to swim with my boys this morning until I put on my swimsuit and lost all confidence in my appearance. I stepped on the scale and saw 167.2 lbs. Just two months ago I was down to 153 lbs, which isn’t even my goal weight. I felt like it was time-time to step it up again, and this time, work on a slightly different approach. A friend of mine once said to me that he wished people would focus more on how healthy choices make them feel, rather than watching the numbers all the time. I think he’s right, but I’m not ready to give up the scale just yet. So I have decided to focus on both. I am currently using myfitnesspal.com to keep track of my caloric intake as well as my exercise. I am going to track my feelings here. My numeric goal is 125 lbs. My emotional goal is to finally feel that I’m in control of my food choices. I think that last part will be the most difficult, but I am going to try to take it one step, and then one day at a time. 

Groundhog’s Day

16 Jul

Do you ever have days when you feel like you’re in the movie “Groundhog’s Day?” Every day starts the same-with the same good intentions to eat healthy and exercise, and then each day ends in guilt and frustration? Well that is what I’ve been experiencing lately-it’s also known as the “rut.” Even though I was doing so well just months ago, I can’t seem to pull myself out of eating poorly. Usually for me, the rut is immediately followed by giving up. Well I REFUSE to do that this time. Even if I have gained a few pounds, I have to keep reminding myself that it’s still MUCH better than it was a year ago. I think part of the reason we get stuck in these patterns is because we tend to be hard on ourselves. We use terms like “cheat” and “fail” and “bad” to describe how we’ve been eating. I think there is a certain amount of shame and guilt associated with those words in the first place. Instead of eating a piece of cake and moving on, we think, “oh why bother, we’ve already ruined the whole day” (or week, or program) which in turn, gives us permission to eat even more out of control. Today, if you veer off in a different direction than where you want to be (and this can be applied to much more than diet) simply dust yourself off, and move forward. Don’t let one measly moment ruin your day, and certainly not your entire fitness plan. Good luck everyone, and I hope to take my own advice today!